The Speech

goddess of healing

He Popped My Public-Speaking Cherry  :)

I hope the college kids from the class are reading this!

I asked Mr. Julie McCoy if there were restrictions to what I can talk about.

I’m not sure if he actually reads my blog.

He said no cussing and no talking about sex.

Clearly, he reads my blog.

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!

I thought, “OK, I can do this. I’ve been boring once. I can remember how that went.”

I saw this as a huge opportunity. I wasn’t getting paid, nor would I get new clients from the experience…YET…

But as I embark on all these career changes, “public speaking” is top of the list….

And like sex, the first time just isn’t going to be great.

I know “50 Shades of Grey” tells a different story, but I don’t think the author has actually had sex, or she would have gotten that detail correct…just saying…

So I was getting the first time out of the way with a friend (just like I did way back when with my real virginity) – or in my case today, friend s – and also in my case, two man friends.

I talked about the Vanilla Version of the content of this blog – My Passion and my mission to release everyone from the zombie apocalypse (status quo).

The improv Q&A at the end was more engaging and fun than the “speech” part, although I wrote a damn fine speech! I think I’ll start with that next time, add some dancing, and maybe have all of us sit on the floor.

I had started to put together a Power Point Presentation, but I’ve never actually done that – EEEK – confession of a tech nerd.

So I put the presentation down and I started my speech just like I write anything else, thinking I could add the presentation in later…I still can…

The speech was today, and I was still editing it today – so I decided to use good old fashioned white board with dry erase markers and hearts around my name.

I did put together a soundtrack too – which kicks ass – Here it is >> GCU Ignite Your Imagination Playlist .

I’m sure I would have made more of an impact had I been dressed up like Mystique…

But it was fun anyway. Like I said, the fact that I got the first one out of the way is HUGE.

I’m no longer a public speaking virgin. Now I can really cut loose and explore the risque side of that realm, jazz it up, be a little less “vanilla” — Maybe get the handcuffs out.

I got this great purple T-shirt though! Woot!!

I’m now an honorary member of the Jerry Colangelo School of Business at Grand Canyon University.

Hey Students – If you’re visiting me here, be sure to reach out.

Like I said – I met Oprah:

Living Bigger

The original working title for this post was “Dreaming Bigger” –

But dreaming is not big enough anymore – The dreams are here right now, so LIVING BIGGER is where it’s at!

I have launched HUGE changes in my life –

These huge changes have meant tight schedules, deadlines, working more, socializing less (not at all), no vacations, and no breaks.

Where is the fun and the chill.

Fun and chill were locked away in the Holiday Gloom :(

As a result, I put myself quite low I on my own priority list.

It’s time for a little chat with myself: “Self, please take your own advice and put yourself first.”

During the weekend, Captain Amazing so BRAVELY provided me with as much support as I would allow him to provide after my son moved away from home – and various other things – a huge volume of minutia.

Captain Amazing said, “It sounds like things aren’t going so well.”

Actually, things are going very well…but with any EPIC adventure, there are rough patches. I just hit a rough patch.

I tried to logically explain these feelings to him…of feeling out of control, of wanting to run away…

I’ll talk about anything. Anyone who knows me knows this fact. However, I’m able to separate myself enough that I’m not really attached – I’m not intimate with the conversation, and my own personal feelings don’t really come up.

It’s so easy to say it to a crowd, but it’s so hard, my love, to say it to you out loud - Florence & The Machine from No Light, No Light

He bravely asked if I was comfortable with him –

Holy shit, what kind of question is THAT.

Of course, I have been thinking about such things, especially during the abysmal holidays, when my role in other people’s lives becomes quite obvious –

It’s a minor bit-part; I’m actually not in the scene during those times because I’m unattached.

Thankfully, I’m not as low as an understudy (so that’s good – I get to play myself in the show).

I’m unskilled at telling a man how important he is to me without the implication or pressure that I need or expect more than what we have, and at the same time, ensuring him that I’m not going anywhere –

…to provide the freedom AND stability with both need and want – We are inventing something new, and it’s scary sometimes.

I’m riding this adventure out, like I did on my great Hawaii adventure in 2013, without an agenda and without expectations.

As I’m doing that, however, I’m keenly aware of new feelings – Like I miss him sometimes (don’t tell him I said that ).

I loathe that feeling so much. It makes me feel powerless and wreaks havoc with my confidence.

“Missing people” has not happened much in my life. I just don’t “miss.” I can count on 1 hand the number of people I have missed in my life (grouping my kids as a unit) –

When I miss my friend Tisha, it’s different – because she died. Neither of us can control that…I just become sad, without wondering about subtext or context.

And there is another feeling that comes up for me with CA – “nurturing” – Don’t know why…but there it is.

We have a great time together – I look forward to his company AND to our sexual adventures – and I’m still very happy and satisfied to take the whole friendship/datingship as it comes –

We have an affinity for each other that I don’t see going away in this lifetime, and I believe it has spanned many lifetimes before.

Nonetheless, some of the shit coming up for me right now is related to the timing of where I am currently with him and “feelings” – and the fact that it’s January, when 2 years ago I was entertaining another man – who is, incidentally, my business partner currently.

Oh, the tangled web I weave!

So these giant leaps of faith I’m taking (personally and professionally) require me to hold hands with my two favorite men – the two men who have been the greatest influences, the most amazing heroes of my life…

– and who have both left me at one point … by myself, unexpectedly abandoned.

While I’m not afraid of being alone or of mending a broken heart – I am terrified of the abrupt nature of how both those events went down – just like the end of my marriage – I didn’t see it coming.

That’s the part that scares me the most – feeling so stupidly unaware – and that I may not have been as connected as I thought I was.

That’s the feeling I have to meditate and breathe through…because I also don’t want to worry about such things. That is not living in the moment, nor is it LIVING BIGGER.

It’s too small for me – that’s putting myself in a cage –

So I have to believe in the intangible and stay the course – and take leaps of faith –

It’s like jumping with a parachute that has no strings – and then depending on these fine men to keep me attached to that parachute…

I can make that analogy and take that jump because they both came back…happily so…on their own terms…

…and they have made my life so much better.

I know that I’m very lucky indeed. I am very grateful – Namaste to my heroes.

On Tuesday, the sun came out (YAY), and I had the opportunity to walk commute:

A 9-mile round trip – and it was delightful .

I walked in the sun, no sleeves, listening to some Disney princess songs, of course singing out loud because I can .

However, when I left the studio at 7:30pm, it was dark. The last time I can remember walking a significant mileage in the dark, other than my shorter walks to Starbucks at 5am, was Hawaii 2 years ago.

As I began my journey home from work, I pulled up the music I listened to from that trip to Hawaii – A lot of Florence and the Machine – and I was whisked back to that great adventure!

The memories hit me like a tidal wave – Like my first steps in the ocean at 4:30am under a nearly full moon while listening to Cosmic Love   – It was amazing!

That whole solo adventure was freedom at its finest!

It was diving into the unknown, living unplanned, without a schedule, without an agenda (other than to have an EPIC adventure), without anybody expecting or demanding anything from me – except for ME.

…and my demands were simple – BE, BREATHE, EXPERIENCE.

It was truly the greatest adventure I’ve ever given myself.

The memories were so powerful and so ingrained in my soul, it felt like I was there again. I could actually smell Hawaii on Scottsdale Road.

During my walk home from work that night, listening to Florence and experiencing the feeling that I was back in Hawaii – I decided to spend the month of January 2015 pretending like I’m on a great adventure in a vast unknown land.

Wednesday: One of my beloved clients called in sick – so I had 2.5 hours unexpectedly available in the middle of my day…

…Hmmm…what should I do with that chunk of time??

As I pondered this great opportunity, I put my headphones on and fired up Spotify. They recommended a new playlist, and so I listened to that on my walk to Whole Foods to purchase my cleansing/detox food/juice for the day.

“Don’t Stop Believin” by Journey was on the list – Great song – (Youngest and I had just been talking about this song a few days ago) –

“Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world.

She took the midnight train going anywhere..”

That’s how I feel when I get overwhelmed, so bogged down by the enormity of the volume of minutia that I just want to run away, go anywhere, to just feel free…so I can breathe…so the weight isn’t so heavy.

By letting go of control like that – feeling truly free – I actually feel more in control of my life and my decisions.

So I asked myself what I needed…sunshine??…outdoors??…

…and then I craved a mountain…

I packed my bags for the day and went to work – saw my first client, and then headed to the mountain.

I think it hit 80 degrees – My favorite temperature – and I ran and walked, passing others on the hike.

…and I felt free…

On January 13th, I am speaking at Grand Canyon University.

It is the students’ final class, and they are putting together a strategic plan, figuring out what they want to do, what their passion is – mission, vision and values.

The professor invited me to do this so I can spark their imagination.

My public speaking consists of teaching exercise and musical theater, so the students may end up doing push-ups and singing “Agony .”

The professor used my Lego Gandalf picture and my jackhammer picture, along with the biography on my blog to introduce me to his students.

This may seem like such a small step – but it’s a giant leap – To declare my CREATIVE SELF to the Universe – and inspire other people to do the same – YIKES!

I’m not nervous about the speaking engagement – It’s the leap itself.

It’s daunting and overwhelming. I’m diving into the unknown again, but not on a “vacation” – in REAL LIFE, both professionally and personally…

These leaps of faith are the biggest AND scariest I’ve ever taken…

…on the other hand –

Say Geronimo!

New Year 2015

Happy New Year!

At least, I’m imagining happiness – since 2014 ended the same way it began – without a party, a kiss, a celebration or sex – Pathetic.

However, all is not lost – and while I have no sex planned in the immediate future – until a week from Monday that I know of for sure (again pathetic ) – I have lots of work planned.

Why does that make everything ok? 

It doesn’t, unless there is money attached to it…

…so I’m rechanneling my optimism.

I present the highlights of the very end of 2014 and the brighter-lights of what’s to come in 2015.

Here’s to being prepared for anything…or at least being prepared to be prepared for anything.

On the day before the last day of 2014, I had an unusual day that resulted in seeing 2 clients I hadn’t planned for and a KILLER leg workout designed and expertly coached by Ms. Sherrie  after a 4.5-mile walk to work with 20 pounds on my back.

Tim Ferriss emailed me also – FINALLY – telling me that he’s hiring a managing editor and would I fit the qualifications – If so, please apply….so I did.

I did that for 3 reasons:

(1) Because I am qualified and I can.

(2) If I get it, great! What an awesome opportunity to dive into the deep end of a larger audience and fancy nerdy internet gadgets and to work with someone I admire.

(3) If I don’t get it, I still did something that most people won’t step outside of their comfort zone to even attempt – put myself out there.

He asked me if I could handle tight deadlines and sticky situations – and if so, how?…

That’s like asking me if I breathe and if so, how.

My life is a multitude of tight deadlines, managing hundreds of clients, my kids’ schedule, writing deadlines, technical glitches, etc.

How do I do it?

I breathe and I get shit done…There is no other option.

It’s difficult to create a hypothetical situation from nothing…although I have just completed that task – Over 7 pages of a “new member” discovering the business that Mr. KC and I are creating.

However, Tim requested that it be under 300 words.

I remember once, a long time ago, Captain Amazing asked how I would react if I walked in and saw another woman there.

There are too many details and variables omitted from that scene to even speculate: Who is the woman? What is she doing? And what are you doing? etc. etc.

I responded with a pause and then said, “That really depends. First, I would never come over without being invited, nor would I enter your house without your knowledge, so the fact that you would be expecting me – and it sounds like that situation would be a surprise to me – I would probably feel disrespected – or I might want to join…I just don’t know…again it would depend on my mood and what I saw …and why I was coming over in the first place…”

He listened…

I added…“But I don’t contemplate such things because that’s not living in the present moment – And it causes me to live in fear and anxiety about something that may or may not ever happen, and I won’t do that to myself…”

“so I’m not going to worry about that happening unless or until that happens.”

He said, “Fair enough.”

So for Tim, I kept my answer about the same – I’ll handle it – with grace and charm – without panic or stress but with enough priority placed on the task at hand, that whatever is happening will be resolved – PERIOD.

Again, how do I breathe? I just do.

There is always a Plan A and a Plan B – I do think about things without judging the situation, but really I take care of the problem, learn from it, and move on.

When I arrived home from work, I put my pajamas on, ate a bowl of oatmeal, and fell asleep on the floor with my kids…I think it was 8pm…and my legs were already sore.

On the last day of 2014, I had the great pleasure of walking 9 miles with very sore quads,

in 40-degree rainy weather. My hands froze because I was holding the umbrella…

It was my commute to work and back – to see 3 of my favorite clients – I have a lot of favorite clients, with even more to come…

I wore my knit beanie cap all day because it was just THAT cold.

After I walked home, I drove Middlest to her New Year’s Eve party, returned home again, put my pajamas on, and cranked the heat.

I prepared a hot apple cider spiked with Fireball – delicious – and …ZZZZZ… again, right around 8pm.

I set my alarm for 9, thinking that I just needed a nap.

Youngest came in at 8:45 and said I received a text from Captain Amazing. He was wishing me a Happy New Year – and was doing it early because he was going out and turning his phone off so he didn’t get a bunch of drunk texts…

…I texted him him back and went back to sleep. The alarm went off at 9. I turned it off and told Youngest to wake me up before midnight …

…she was knitting me a new beanie cap…

(Here are her efforts – Outstanding – She knitted the scarf too)

At 11:55, she woke me up, and we counted down the New Year … and back to bed I went…

Earlier that day on Twitter, I created an ideal New Year’s Eve agenda that involved many drinks and lots of sex …

Sadly, that didn’t happen…

Maybe next year …

By the way, in my lifetime, I have NEVER celebrated the New Year with a man I am involved with (except during marriage a small handful of times, but by midnight, we weren’t speaking to each other, so it really doesn’t count)

..and NEVER EVER with a kiss at midnight.

– I’m going to have to stop hoping for that to happen. I just don’t think it’s in the cards for me.

THE NEW YEAR CHANGES

I spent much of the Christmas holiday working – yes on deadlines and tedious schedules – …I created plot lines and developed characters…

…because I have an exit strategy launched…

I’m boldly going where I’ve only dreamed about going. And I’m not sure what it looks like exactly…but I know that it’s going to be great.

Resolutions? I don’t believe in those because I solve problems as they arise – and I strategically plan.

Hopes and dreams? Yep – lots – And their fruition has been strategically planned – with enough wiggle room and flexibility to go with the flow…be prepared for anything…or at least be prepared to be prepared for anything.

1. Books published – along with the creation of the persona that defines the main character and the word she lives in. I don’t half ass things, and when I pull off the plan that is inside my head and written in my notebook, it will be unlike anything that I’ve ever known to have been done before – EPIC!

I don’t know how other authors feel about their books as they are writing them – but this is how good I believe my stories to be –

I’m so excited to finish writing my books …

so I can read them.  

I think that really says something about what I’m creating.

2. Launch my EPIC business with Mr. KC – It’s really launched already. We’ve been working very hard on it, and today we are working on design elements, budgets, presentations.

3. Schedule more speaking engagements. I have one scheduled, January 13th at Grand Canyon University.

4. …cliffhanger… :) 

Happy New Year!

The Audience of 1000

The cherry on top of the day after the last day of the second shittiest week of 2014 was a Brazilian wax –

That’s how I celebrated that my personal hell was over – With a woman with blue bangs whom I’d never met before plucking every strand of hair from my body parts – 

I also FINALLY PLAYED – and removed the “under” from “underfunned” by hanging out with all my favorite boys and my two best girls.

The first shittiest week of 2014 occurred last January in Hawaii – which was tainted with such enormous negativity that I wanted to hurl myself into the ocean with the hope that it would swallow me whole…

…and then spit me out, so I could come back as a mermaid. #splash

This last week, the shittiness was all on me and my body, the perfect storm of emotional triggers, demonic possession, and 1000 pain receptors going haywire all at once, and all surrounding a holiday and birthdays…

Basically, this period felt like Quentin Tarantino directed it

#tmi #fml

I always forget how much I dislike those…periods, holidays and birthdays…This year, it was a trifecta.

…every year, however, holidays and birthdays trick me – They say, “This is your  year – THE year that you’ll discover why people love holidays and birthdays so much.”

Nothing says bah-humbug quite like a nomadic single – and nothing feels quite as tribeless as a girl with a new tribe who all have other families. Big fat bummer.

I also made a couple of catastrophic mistakes.

I’m not sure why I continue to fuck up so royally. It would be really helpful if I stopped.

Here’s a secret: When the red devil is possessing my body, I do have satanic dreams…

… Dreams nightmares about what it would be like to have a “traditional” life where I “fit in” – have a “traditional” mom/daughter relationship with my girls, get a REAL job (whatever THAT means), and have a  “boyfriend”  –

…and that maybe I should be doing THAT with my life instead of remaining somewhat tribeless and bucking the system….

…while I lead this revolution against the suburban zombie apocalypse like I’m Joan Of Arc or Katniss Everdeen.

When did I volunteer as Tribute? Who signed me up to be the Mocking Jay?

But I wouldn’t even know what to do with that if I had that – What if I had a “traditional” life with a traditional “boyfriend”   – with all the labels that accompany that: leashes, dog tags, obligations…

Do I just kiss him and then leave him alone in the corner?

The week began like this: I was leaving my final client’s appointment after 11 hours of work at that point which was 6 p.m. – and I could feel exhaustion and desperation setting in –

Earlier in the day, I had noted that I was overworked and underfunned –

That is not the best space for me to be invading.

…and I could hear the ocean taunting me. Keep in mind, I live in Arizona.

I was thinking, “I need a vacation – I need a break before I break.”

…so I entered the week with a frame of mind, body, and spirit of uncontrollable burnout.

Second, Captain Amazing and I had been brainstorming about a project I’m pretty excited about. It could be enormously profitable and fun – and I want stacks of cash in my bank account – and funness.

He was describing a position – and how being in that position would maximize certain pleasure centers, and he would then demonstrate how eye contact could be made, creating and keeping “connection.”

I realized, silently in my head, “Hmmm…I don’t do that…”

…and then I got a little bit sad. I’ve only opened my eyes and made that connection with one person.

*Note, that one connection was not with the man I was married to –  probably one of the 1000 reasons I’m not. 

I have had sporadic attempts to open my eyes in the last few months … usually while he explores my juicy little peach

…all while telling myself this lie – that I keep my eyes closed so that I can feel more…

The truth is, I feel less – 

“That is the point,” said the commitmentphobe in the front row.

So after his comment, I had a little chat with myself and said, “Self – put your big girl panties on and open your fucking eyes. Keep them open.”

Of course, I think I’m invincible and that I can handle it. #wonderwoman

I thought, “I could dive in, just a bit.”

I was so wrong. I did complete the task successfully – in action – I kept my eyes open the whole time, but the results were less than favorable.

I was shaking, crying, nauseous, and my chest hurt.

The entire next day, I was overcome with waves of indescribable feelings, sheer panic, shortness of breath, uncontrollable shaking, nausea, and debilitating pain – with a red hot ball of lead just under my belly button…

…and my uterus cried – not just gentle tears, but convulsive sobs .

Thank you, Quentin Tarantino. .

I don’t know how “girls” do this – all this feelings crap  – I really don’t.

So I was in bed by 8 p.m. on my birthday (Wednesday) because of the pain and feeling like a bewildered nothing

 Reminder. If I know what I bring to the table, it’s okay to eat alone.

Sure I now have an audience of over 1000 on Twitter and on Facebook; I got about 200 birthday notes on Facebook and about 20 texts wishing me a happy birthday…but I was missing the only one that really I wanted.

The first phone call I received was by a gorgeous man who left an an awesome message, took me out for lunch, called me later, emailed me, and texted me.

I still felt like a nothing?why?

…a nothing with a whole lotta pain and mystifying disappointment…and then a bit anger??

I was truly pisstified.

After I had gone to bed at 8, Youngest came in to gently awaken me and tell me that I had received a text – and that ironically it had nothing to do with my birthday.

I very groggily said, “Set the phone down.”

And then another text came in. She said, “Oh here’s another birthday text.”

I went back to sleep…until Youngest and Middlest were goofing around, and I heard a crash and a blood-curdling scream .

I jumped out of bed and went to the girls faster than Superman…I don’t know how I did it – I had probably been bitten by a bit Kryptonite.

I lifted the drawers that had fallen, moved Youngest to the bed while Middlest got ice…I put the ice on her back – Youngest was fine.

However, I was doubled over in severe pain and thought I was going to pass out or vomit or both.

I made a mad dash to the bathroom with the speed of a 90-year-old crippled sloth, and realized that I had injured my knee in the giant leap from my bed to the other room.

SHIT!

I hobbled back to bed, texted a reply, and we all tucked in for the night.

Then the girls and I began the teenage delirious overtired giggle-fest…and I remembered that the night before, Youngest had punched me in the boob while we were sleeping.

I told her this – I said, “It didn’t feel like an elbow as you were rolling over – It felt like you sat up and punched me with your fist. IT HURT SO BAD.”

She replied, “Like this?” and sat up on her knees, both fists above her head and yelled, “FOR NARNIA,”  and then motioned as if she was stabbing me in the chest.

We died laughing.

It’s a thing now.

The good news is, I didn’t get a mix CD for my birthday this year that crushes my soul every time I hear it.

Bad news, I didn’t get an orgasm either….the one thing I actually wanted for my birthday –

I hope there is a raincheck floating around out there!

Stupid body – Stupid everything else!

So the next day was Thanksgiving…and I had trouble making a gratitude list. The pain was so bad and I was holding back tears.

I received a “Happy Thanksgiving” text, to which I replied, “Bah humbug. I should have had you get me drugs in Mexico. FML.”

“What’s FML?” he asked.

“Fuck my life,” I replied.

He texted back, “. You ok?”

I spent 30 minutes typing a response, deleting it, retyping it, and deleting it, until finally I said, “Apparently not, since it took about 30 minutes to come up with a reply. Is it too early to drink? Can I borrow a cigarette?”

He called me and we talked a bit. I felt sick.

Middlest and I decided to go to the gym anyway. I just loaded myself up on pain meds so that I could push myself through this hell.

I had been taking 4 Advil per dose plus “the other stuff” so I could numb myself enough to rejoin the ranks of unicorn status so I could run again…

…run like a vampire from 1000 burning suns…

I liked the “other stuff.” I was afraid it would make me queasy or hallucinate, but it didn’t make me sick until it wore off –

…and then the pain became more than I could bear – and the hallucinations kicked in, and I thought I could successfully sext anyone on Twitter.

And then the pain and anger transformed into white hot  RAGE .

So I decided to rage quit. #ragequit

I had a white hot rage workout Saturday in which I beat the shit out of the basketball court with a 12-pound medicine ball –

I swear officer, I only emptied the clip in the interest of thoroughness.

I also FINALLY felt like I needed to talk to someone – but who?

I needed honest objectivity, and no woman was really going to give me that. They were going to side with the irrational hormones that were running amok, and I didn’t want to hear that.

…nor did I want to be subjected to 1000 rounds of male bashing…when I knew the answer was all within me.

Women do not understand the non-emotional workings of logic, and THAT makes me crazy. I cannot rely upon the vast majority of women to be my “go-to” anyones for any kind of advice on any subject matter at all.

…talk about feeling like a tribeless nothing…

I still needed to talk. I hadn’t spoken about the true source of my pain, except for how I hurt my knee.

…so I turned toward my teens – who are, in fact, my most objective and honest “peers” and understand how my mind works.

Middlest said, “Mom, you’re acting like a teenage girl, PLUS you have raging hormones.”

I said, “I know – and I’m not a girl!”

She said, “I know you’re not, so stop it.”

SLAP * SLAP * SLAP * SLAP * SLAP * SLAP

She gave my emptiness a name.

Closeness shouldn’t lead to disappointment, overwhelm, and excruciating pain that requires prescription pain medication – It was the demon hormones.

Sunday arrived- FINALLY – The red devil had finally been exorcised through my excessive exercising – my Brazilian was on the books, along with another lunch meeting –

…and I received an unexpected delight – a good morning with an invitation to breakfast.

Awesome! Life was back to normal.

Breakfast was fun – except I didn’t have much of an appetite – The highlight was the “sausage incident,” which scarred my girls-

I’ve never laughed quite so hard having a sausage forcefully shoved into my mouth like that – repeatedly…

…then again, boys will be boys…

I used that situation as a teaching opportunity for Middlest – I told her they all do that. She said, “Mommy NO.”

I said, “Who else is going to be straight up and honest about what to expect?”

She said, “Good point.”

On the way to school to school today, we talked philosophically about hugging messy kids with food and dirt all over their faces.

I explained that it’s better to learn to be messy when you’re a kid – because you have to learn it at some point in your life – It might as well be when someone can help you clean up.

It’s like learning to fall down, like falling from a bike…you have to learn it and you will – It’s better learn when you’re small – It doesn’t hurt as much, and it’s easier to get up.

Then they said together, “Mom, we need to have an intervention.”

“Why,” I asked.

Middlest said, “Because you have feelings.

I said, “No I don’t.”

Youngest said, “We’ve been meaning to talk to you. You were mushy yesterday.”

I said, rather defensively, “I was NOT. I didn’t do anything remotely mushy.”

Then they made fun of me saying how cute HLB (Happiest Little Boy) is.

I said, “Well he is!”

Now I really have to rage quit!!

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